Sunday, March 20, 2011

The first real post! (It's long)


Upon writing and viewing a long-winded and ultimately useless introduction, I've decided to bypass that and just give it to you straight up.

Today's topic of discussion:

 http://www.theage.com.au/lifestyle/lifematters/putting-in-v-putting-out-20110321-1c34c.html

A woman asking the lifestyle section of the Age newspaper - which is occupied by only the most intelligent and the most experienced people who can answer any and all questions one might have about the eternal mystery that is life (see: middle aged, more or less single women) – if she is a bad wife. The premise? Her husband of some 18 years apparently lashes out at his wife every now and then when he is unhappy with his home renovation projects. The problem? You guessed it, SEXXX. This woman doesn’t wanna get down with her husband after he yells at her, but complies anyway. Eventually she tells him how she feels, enter: bad wife.
She don’t wanna fuck, he does, she feels wronged by his outbursts, he feels she isn’t honouring the marriage.

Now since there isn’t a whole lot of information, forgive me for making a few assumptions, but this has barely to do with the question, but rather the reply or ‘advice’ given. Just like with school, it's always best to do your readings kiddies, so read the article first, if you want to understand this post anyways.

Right out of the gates, the first thing this ‘sex educator’ Maureen Matthews talks about is other cultures and their predisposition to viewing wives as property. I think we’ve all seen, read or heard about this kind of thing, it used to be called REAL LIFE. Ever do ANY HISTORY EVER? Then you’ve probably read about the phenomenon of the man being the provider and the woman being a home maker. In recent years though, it’s been relegated to the ranks of savage, barbaric and namely CHAUVENISTIC shackling.
The best part is how she finishes that statement with RAPE WITHIN MARRIAGE being outlawed in Australia. Here we don’t only get the image of this man possessing this woman, we also get the inference that she is being raped within her own marriage. If you read this article, you may have noticed how the woman doesn’t sound too distressed, yes it’s a marital problem, but if I got raped I certainly wouldn’t be writing to the lifestyle section about it  . . .

You see this kind of relationship used to work, when men went out and did their thang during the day, came home and the lady would have dinner cooked and whatever. Eventually though, this wasn’t enough for women and the world saw the advent of feminism, a so called equal rights movement that demanded exactly that for women. Now when a man vents some anger at his own shortcomings in the form of yelling at his wife, it’s called abuse.

“Far from being a bad wife, you have erred on the side of being too patient and submissive. He has failed to love, honour and cherish his wife.”

Not only do we not know anything about this wife, except that she has been subjected to some yelling from her husband, but we also do not know anything about the husband, only that he is partial to venting at his wife.
HE HAS FAILED TO LOVE, HONOUR AND CHERISH HIS WIFE. Not only has this poor, poor soul been subjected to some Guantanamo type shit, but she has also erred on the side of being TOO GOOD a wife. Yup, it’s all there, read the article folks.

“He should have been made aware of the effects of his bullying from the very start. Now, even if you are as rich as Croesus, you do not have a loving relationship in which to enjoy the fruits of your labours.”

This bully needs to be put in his place Casey Heynes style, lady. What you need to do is go home and bodyslam your hubby, that’ll learn him for yelling. In fact, just body slam everyone who yells, and the world will be a better place. Sorry sports fans, you’re bullies and you must be dealt with.
Now, even if you are as rich as Croseus- wait what? CROSEUS? Dayummmm this bitch must be like, a doctor or some shit right? One flimsy reference to Greek history? The very next thing this genius writes will be gospel, trust me, this chick is next level, too smart for us mere mortals. 

The wife does not have a loving relationship in which to enjoy the fruits of her labours. 

Lady, your husband is just a criminal, and that’s that. Those three houses you renovated? ALL YOU BABY. Whatchu talkin bout husband? He ain’t contributed SHIIIIET to them houses, they belongs to you sista. Those houses are the fruits of YOUR labour, and your loud husband just won’t let you enjoy them.


Let me play the role of Judge for a second:
Judge: you stand accused of being a bad husband, how do you plead?
Man: not guilty
Judge: you married this woman 18 years ago, and since then have (to the best of our knowledge) stayed faithful, played a part in the renovation of 3 houses and other such ‘wealth creation’ exercises, and you STILL want to have sex with your wife? After you yelled at her? You sir, are what society calls a “piece of shit”. Who are you to want sex from your wife? We have a word for that these days too, it’s called RAPE.
I know we don’t have capital punishment in Australia, but I’m recommending you for extradition to Texas, so you can await a fate truly befitting swine like yourself; death.

That’s not even the end, you see children, this is where it gets good.

“If your marriage does not survive, it will not be because you failed as a wife. Rather, you will have succeeded in standing up for your right to be treated with dignity and respect. The failure will be his if he cannot accept that.”

If you end up getting divorced, you can take solace in the fact that Maureen Matthews, a sex educator, speaker and founder of the ‘online female sensuality business’ bliss4women, have outlined allllllllll the reasons why he is wrong, and you are right. The very best part of this article is how this unbelievably stupid woman has brought up the idea of divorce when it was never EVER mentioned even one time by the lady with the problem. Correct me if I’m wrong, but did the question contain anything that would even suggest divorce as an option?
If your marriage does not survive your husband yelling, it won’t be because you failed as a wife. Rather you will have succeeded in standing up for your right to be treated with an inside voice at all times. The failure will be his if he cannot accept that yelling = divorce.

The sad part is that there are so many more things wrong with this article that I can’t even begin to address, because after all, who wants to read something more than 3 pages long?

It should also be noted that ‘online female sensuality business’ actually translates to sex shop. Click the link in the original article and see where it redirects to. Funny how female sensuality business is OK, but men using pornography? STAY AWAY FROM MY CHILDREN YOU SICKO.

 The next one will be shorter,
Helyetica

9 comments:

  1. woah that's some crazy stuff

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  2. Nothing like sitting down in the morning with my coffee to read a good size post. Good to see you blogging.

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  3. Very nice post, enjoyed reading it.

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  4. A long post, but quite informative. :)

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  5. It's 6:35am where I'm at, read half your post, didn't read the article, and shit I gotta sleep. This is pretty damn interesting stuff, Ima post again with my comments when I can.

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  6. Long post, but good writing!
    + Follower :)

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  7. That sounds bad... some seduction works better than a beating when requesting sex; the beating is easier though. What a coward.

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