Sunday, July 31, 2011

Part 2: The 1 Year Anniversary

It's been an entire year since the death of Wiz Khalifa. The moment he put ink to paper was the moment he signed his sorry soul away, leaving himself as just another one in the long line of fake-ass afterthoughts.

A few months ago we wrote Wiz an obituary on the eve of his debut Industry effort, Rolling Papers. Writing this now, I can say his effort far exceeded my expectations of a flop. Not only did he manage to produce a steaming turd of an effort, he managed to find the drive to coat it in an extra layer of turd varnish in the form of synths.

Shitty music aside, there was the little glimmer of hope that this was just a slight blemish, and the Wiz of old would shine through after his obligatory Industry effort. The reason we here at Stash Box took Wiz's death at heart was because he never always used to be a soft ass bitch. There was a time where we used to like Wiz and his music. Whatever expectations I was clinging on to, however, have been dashed, BIG TIME. Not only did Wiz decide to start spitting some weak-ass rhymes, he broke his own principles and decided to submit to the clutches of a bonafide trick-ass bitch.

Who exactly is this triflin ass bitch??

Enter none other than Amber Rose: the woman famous for being Kanye West's former cockpocket. Wiz fell for a bitch who is only interested in hogging his spotlight.

While Amber Rose may have a thick ass and may be a top-notch nasty bitch, it still doesn't excuse the fact that Wiz is pullin some bitch made shit like:
- being straight up soft on Twitter, exchanging cute love tweets
- getting her name tattooed on his finger
- saying she will be "the last girl I’m ever gonna be with".

Wiz Khalifa is a straight up phony. After claiming that he doesn't care about them hoes in countless songs, his true colours show and he ends up falling for the biggest hoe of them all, showing us that he's been frontin the ENTIRE time. This woman ONLY wants the fame, evidenced through her latest "leaked" pics fiasco. Uncle Luke, the godfather of 'not carin about no hoe', sums it up best: "[Wiz Khalifa] can't spot a triflin' woman in the room to save [his life]." Just like all his counterparts in mainstream hip-hop today, Wiz Khalifa has developed into one weak-ass sing-song soft motherfucker.

....aaand to cap it all off, here's footage of Wiz Khalifa being a straight up bitch:

Remember kids, you can't turn a hoe into a housewife...


Sunday, June 26, 2011

Tupac back?

A little over 10 days ago the hip-hop world celebrated (what would have been) Tupac Shakur's 40th birthday on June 16. We here at Stash Box have mad love for Tupac, one of the best in the game, dead or alive. In addition, Pac was one of the realest and baddest motherfuckers to have ever lived.

While the internet media boomed with a bunch of Pac related content consisting of tributes and other rappers recalling memories of Pac, one thing that came out during the period was a new single by Rick Ross and Meek Mill entitled 'Tupac Back'. According to Rick Ross, the record was conceived as a tribute to Pac and his impact on the game. As Rick Ross puts it they were "paying homage to Tupac". Let's have a listen to this homage...

Bringing Tupac back? This track is steaming pile of shit: the same brand of ignant, generic shit on a whack beat being produced these days. Apart from the referencing of several song TITLES (not lyrics) and his name, this track ain't got shit to do with Pac's legacy. Trust Rick Ross (one of the phoniest, fake-ass motherfuckers in the game) and his cronie Meek Mill (who is Meek Mill anyway?) to be making money off Tupac's name through this whack ass song about themselves. Who expected Rick Ross (a.k.a Officer Ricky) to pay proper homage to Tupac in the first place? Is Officer Ricky really making an homage to Pac when he's saying shit like "Brenda's having my baby"? Isn't Brenda's Got a Baby about a 12 year old girl who fell victim to the fucked up shit (underage pregnancy via incest) that happens in the ghetto? Rick Ross don't know shit about shit.

Pac wasn't about that bullshit, he never spit about Mercedes Benzs and brand new rims. There's some words of Pac that I will never forget. This footage is from an interview done in 1994, while Pac was in prison...

What I want people to know is that don't.... don't support the phonies, support the real youknowwhatimean? How can these people be talking about how they so real but they don't care about our communities? How can they be talking about how they all this y'know the hood bahblahblahblahblah they don't care about our communities. Listen to the words people say in they lyrics and tell me, if that's some real shi- if that's real to you? yknowwhatimean? Listen to what they sayin. Dont just bop your head to the beat, peep the game, and listen to what I'm sayin, hold us accountable for it nahmean?
Listen to what people say, watch people. Cuz you can fake for a long time, but one day you gon show yourself to be a phony yknowwhatimean? And that's what alot of people are doin these days.

17 years later, Pac's name ends up getting spit all over the same shit he was telling you to watch out for? Also, Officer Ricky is a prime example of someone who got outed as a phony. Tupac Back = a steaming pile of shit on his legacy.

The good people here at Stash Box are going to pay homage to Tupac's legacy by bringing some of that REAL Tupac vibe back: We are declaring war on these same bitch-made phonies.

To all the fake ass bitches like Meek Mill and Rick Ross, this is what 2Pac is saying from thugz mansion...

Watch out for part 2 of this multiple part expose on fake-ass rappers in the game.....


Thursday, June 23, 2011

Honeybeats EP

While we all up on this phony business, it's time for a fresh breath of the real. Today our boy Kaligraph E has just dropped his first official release: a little 6 track EP full of delicious gems entitled 'Honeybeats EP'. Like a pack of candy snakes, each track carries a small punch of sweetness per dose.

Click the album cover below to cop a dose of that honey.

Thursday, June 16, 2011


Peep this, even though Killah Priest spit this in '97 it still applies just as much today. Theres too many phony MC's out there this year, and they better get ready....

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

3 months later...

It's been a while since we put an update, but expect a few new gems in the not too distant future.

It's been 3 months since I made the post about Libya, 3 months since NATO undertook their operation.

So what's been happening since they started?
- Bombing civilians? Check
- Killing of civilians? Check
- Daily bombings? Check
- Bombing neutral buildings including universities? Check
- Using high grade and possibly experimental weaponry (depleted uranium)? Check

Instead of giving a measure of what's real, the disinformation game is taking place, drawing away from the real issue of kids being blown up by discrediting the "lies" coming out of Libya and dismissing the fact that people are being blown up altogether.

When Hilary Clinton and Barack Obama start speaking on behalf of "the world" but India, China and Russia want nothing to do with this, who do Hilary and Obama speak for?

And when Lupe Fiasco starts calling Obama the biggest terrorist, you know shit just got real.

Dirty games are taking place.

You better start recognising folks.


p.s. Keep eating that dick, punk. Looking forward to more comments.
p.p.s. LeBron, you a bitch.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Golden Standards

Alright folks, I know it’s been a long while since there was an update, and I for one, blame my ridiculous uni schedule and stacking up of bullshit group assignments. Also I’ve been super lazy, but today came an article that finally stirred me from my slumber. Two police shootings in Melbourne in 2 days…no thanks. Osama Bin Laden killed? Pass. Nope, this one is about Australian television’s night of nights; the TV Week Logie awards.

Now for those loyal international readers (ones we haven’t already lost due to sporadic updating), I’ll break it down for you. Americans: think Daytime Emmys, but downgraded by about 10 times. Worse shows, worse actors, much lower production values and just grade-A bullshit. Everyone else: it’s a shitty award show where people who consistently give terrible performances on television are rewarded for their shittiness. It’s kind of like if there was an award show where the only candidates are Andy Dick.

Anyhow, here is today’s reading material, hot off the press from the ever illustrious .

 Ahhh the coveted gold Logie; the award everyone on Australian television lusts after for some unknown reason. The damn thing is ugly as hell.

Karl, his wife and the gold Logie.

 The winner of the gold Logie for 2011 is one Karl Stefanovic, television host and disaster report go-to-guy for channel Nine in 2011. Hilariously made a fool of himself in a previous Logies award ceremony by getting smashed and doing drunk-guy shit on camera.

“Thanking his wife Cas, he said: "She has been a great influence on my life and has also got the best arse I have ever seen."

Enter: contemporary feminism. Now if you have done your reading, you will know that this article is mostly about shit that happened at the Logies that night. However part of this article is devoted to Karl’s acceptance speech, where he apparently made and ass of himself.
The above quote is the line in question where people have ridiculously dubbed Stefanovic a sexist, or at the very least, labeled the comment sexist. Let’s take a step back and examine this line for a bit. Karl Stefanovic has done his fair share of reporting this year, the various and numerous natural disasters, the royal wedding, all that jazz. He comes home to be at this award ceremony and wins the most illustrious Logie of them all. In his acceptance speech he credits his wife (read it people: WIFE) for having been a great influence on his life, and also for having “the best arse [he] has ever seen”.    
Now, children, can anybody tell me what is so sexist about this comment? The man is obviously elated from having beat out all the other chumps for the most-valuable-chump award. In his acceptance speech, the man compliments his WIFE - not his girlfriend or mistress, but the woman he’s married and has children with – for being a great influence on him and also for having a nice arse. SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT WENT WRONG HERE.
In 2011, countless articles have been written about how women are not appreciated or valued enough by men, not given the credence they deserve and downright trodden on by us chauvinist pigs (there are some on this very blog), and this guy compliments his wife’s ass and is immediately labeled a sexist? Is there even a slight possibility of men NOT being labeled sexist short of first being spayed? I can’t recite my fucking ABC’s without being labeled a fucking sexist.

Now I know some of you might be thinking this is the end, and oh how I wish it was, but if you’ve ever read any of my shit on Stashbox, you’ll know that it’s never over with these stupid femcunts.

Most of the article is useless babble about other stuff that happened at the Logies, but right near the end comes the kicker:

“But picking up her best new talent award, The Circle host Chrissie Swan showed why the audience loves her.
Looking at ageing classical musician Andre Rieu, she said: " I tell you what Andre, if I was 30 years older!"
Six months pregnant, Swan said: "I'm a hormone with a hairdo" and spoke of how she shares the couch on The Circle with a group of women who share their tears and "we talk about boobies and whatever".
"See if you can throw that piece of cake into my mouth"

I tell you what Andre, if I was 30 years older. And maybe 100 kilos lighter… But seriously now, this woman who hosts a morning panel show (a panel made up of women, hint hint) has basically propositioned (you know how I mean) a distinguished musician, and "the audience loves her". ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? Not only is the generously named “best new talent award” a fucking farce (as well as the whole ceremony itself), but she has gotten on stage and made a sex gag in front of hundreds of thousands and it’s all good? FUCK THAT.

 For those of you who don't get the point yet, I'll put it in layman's terms:
 ‘I love and appreciate my wife’s influence and physical body’ – SEXIST
‘I’m a massively fat land whale and I would have sex with you, Andre Rieu, if only I was EVEN OLDER THAN I ALREADY AM’ – HILARIOUS
Take into account that Andre Rieu is an established and highly acclaimed classical musician who makes millions of dollars and is considered a pretty funny guy, and this fat bitch becomes more and more offensive as the seconds pass.

You think this:
She isn't even pregnant here. No I'm not kidding

Has a legit case to get with this????
See that shit behind him? That's a goddamn ORCHESTRA. You couldn't even get a chair behind Swan.

Not only does this quote offend me, but my eyes have been assaulted with the visual of this queen-of-dugongs while she is fully clothed, let alone doing the nasty with an old man. “Where is the justice?” I hear you asking. I’ll tell you where; in Johanna Griggs’ control:

“Seven's Johanna Griggs, accepting a Logie for Better Homes and Gardens, took him to task on it, and the room was with her. "Karl, we don't have bum and boobs jokes; it's just nice family viewing," she said.

She later told The Australian that the ceremony "didn't have to be like that . . . I was just saying, 'C'mon, guys, it's a really smart room just lift it a little bit'".

No kidding people. Family viewing apparently does not include the appreciation of a man’s wife, however it does include a vision of obesity (won’t somebody think of the children?) propositioning a distinguished man in front of hundreds of thousands. We don’t have bum and boobs jokes hey Johanna? Well your good friend Jabba the Hut begs to differ, “we talk about boobies and whatever”.

And I ask again: WHERE IS THE JUSTICE?

Enjoy being free while you can, boys, because with the way this bullshit is seeping into peoples’ minds, being a man will soon be a crime punishable by death…or maybe they’ll just make you get with Chrissie Swan. 


Monday, March 28, 2011

Obituaries: Wiz Khalifa

CAMERON Jabril Thomaz was born in Minot, North Dakota to a mother and a father serving in the military. Due to his parents’ service, Thomaz spent time in Germany, England and Japan before finally landing in Pittsburgh to attend Taylor Allderdice High School.

A rapper to some, a star to himself, when he was 16, had all the intentions to keep it G. Notorious for taking niggas hoes to smoke hella trees wit em, the young boy fresh was known for rollin blunts of 50s, stuck in his moms basement, havin dro for sale, however niggas was smokin haze then. His stage name ‘Wiz Khalifa’ derived from people saying that he was wise beyond his years, with ‘Khalifa’ meaning successor, Cameron always had a sunny disposition and would never turn down a shot of Tanqueray. From champagne pouring to paper plane twistin, he was never lacking in confidence. Always critical of those speculating that his plane would land, he failed to see that his landing was part of his own doing...

Enjoying growing success as his work progressed over the years, Khalifa’s movement, the ‘Taylor Gang’ was his most positive creation, but later on he would find it was also his most heinous. The ‘Taylors’, growing in numbers, were forever singing his praise, and rightly so. After all, the Kid Frankie inked his whole body and you know what? He never gave a motherfuck.

However it is yet more ‘Taylor Gang’ members who would see to his end. After signing to Atlantic Records in 2010, the Flight School graduate (with honours) had his soul taken from him. Forced to do collaboration after collaboration with ‘Stargate Productions’, they took the young boy’s heart and destroyed it, forever relegating him to the hallowed halls of post-fame. As such, the new-school ‘Taylors’ support him no matter how many unnecessarily poppy, over-synthesised and shitty tracks he puts out now, claiming they had always been there from the beginning. Now these lames fucks wit them blunts full of schwag and rep 'Taylor' as if they mean it. Wiz has had his image defaced by these new ‘Taylors’, having his face used as display pictures on facebook in celebration of the music industry’s latest sacrifice to the lord Baphomet, rather than to mourn the death of such a G.

Once so true to his roots as the Taylor Gang General, the Prince of the City turned dark horse for Los Angeles one day woke up, looked in the mirror and had to shoot the first thing he saw...

A truly sad day for all involved, on the eve of his first album dropping from Atlantic Records, we are gathered here today to mourn the death of Wiz Khalifa. To the ages, we commend your memory, from the jets to the paper planes, still blazin still blazin still blazin...

A tribute to when Wiz was still with us:

Helyetica & dlx.